When Garth Brooks took the stage at the 123rd Annual Texas Country Jamboree in Hambriston, the famous farm of the Barron Cattle Empire, he didn’t expect to leave in shame under two minutes later.

“For 22 years, Garth Brooks has been the headliner of this event,” said a sad Toby Keith after Brooks was booed offstage, “but we really can’t keep pretending he’s not playing for the other side.”

Toby Keith is correct, patriots. Garth Brooks left the real country scene the day he decided to play a set in Central Park. He thought he would attract his fans from the surrounding rural areas, but instead, he learned liberals just love him.

Unfortunately, he’s spent two decades loving them back. His comments about his own fans being “assholes” has basically tanked his career and ended any hopes he had of running a successful bar in Nashville.

“We’re not really looking forward to his opening, “said Nashville Mayor Art Tubolls, “we expect there to be a lot of chaos, with leftists swarming the area to flash their fake breasts in front of children.”

Mayor Tubolls doesn’t want his city to be another San Fransisco, where drug addicts poop on veterans regularly before the city Narcans them and gives them free room and board.

No, patriots, there’s nothing humane about that whole situation, but that’s what 148 years of Democrat control gets you. God Bless America.